A helpful guide for slam poetry judges.
Look directly at the crotch
Gently wave away all
thoughts about how
you never cared about crotches of poems
before this poet
Consider the subject
is it about love loss
surgery hesitation
breath death threats
surgery surgery?
Does it rhyme?
Look at the crotch again
Don’t look up to see the poet looking
at you looking at their crotch
there’s no need to involve them
in this ruptured universe
Grasp for any gendered word
Is tree bark about being a man?
Are they saying anything about blood
or ribcages? Ribcages are a trans thing now?
Stare at its chest
They’re saying
something something
inclusion now
or was that
foregone conclusion
Wait don’t you have to score the poem?
How can you score if you don’t know
Oh why did they write about a Jack pine
it’s all so unfamiliar just words like an apogee
with no point of gender reference
They look trans
why aren’t they talking about that then?
Talk about that then
Time’s almost up
Their crotch is telling you nothing
Do you score them like a cis person?
Maybe they’re straight dear lord
did you get it all wrong?
How low a score can you give them
if they might not be trans?
They warned you about slam
now here you are
crotchmerized
Charlie Petch, "How to Tell If a Poem Is Trans or Not" Copyright © 2021 by Charlie Petch
Source: "How to Tell If a Poem Is Trans or Not" From Why I was late (Brick Books, 2021)